Going Out On A Flooded Limb

It started many moons ago, as most things do, with an exciting overseas journey. She had broken away from a stifling mother daughter relationship and an extraordinarily loving father daughter relationship. She was heading to the United States of America and was looking for adventure. She was leaving goodness and truth behind, just for the moment, and would be furious to be written about in such a way.
She met Tom in a bar. He was handsome and debonair and flirted outrageously with the ladies and she knew he was hers. She had a few women to beat off first, but Tom was as smitten as she was. She was slender and intelligent and beautiful and Australian. They married. They had children. They embraced goodness and truth together and all was well.
Tom still felt empty and dissatisfied. He had had women listening to his every word, of which he had many, and sitting at his feet as he expounded forth, all of his life. Suddenly there was only one and she would mention over dinner with friends that she had married a monologue. That it had been a 20 year monologue. He wrote poetry and shared it with young, beautiful girls. They were smitten and looked adoringly at him in public.

Tom believed with all his heart and soul that fulfillment could and would come through a woman. She had been under his nose for some years, but he realised that he had found the perfect woman.

To be continued with permission.

It's All About Mary

Edgar had once said to Julian that it was all about Mary. Julian absorbed and held that thought and watched and waited. Meanwhile, the house and business had been flooded and Julian had to get out of her dressing gown, put on her flood clothes and get back downstairs and into it. She had heard from Stewart that Mary and Edgar had been in town and that Mary hadn't popped in to say hi. She was devastated. Didn't she know the trouble that they were in? That they needed help?

Perhaps Edgar was right and it was all about Mary.

Hermione had suggested dinner on Friday with Mary and Friday. She didn't want to go anymore.
She was depressed and dealing with a ridiculous clean up. 'Throw it all out', said Hermione and Emerald. At the end of the day, Emerald was seen foraging in the rubbish flood heaps of the neighbours and found old flood photos, strange little implements and beer glasses. As well as a rather loud picnic rug with a plastic backing. Julian threw it out and Emerald brought it back in. Hermione was also suggesting rather loudly that she should throw out her deep fat fryer and her bbq. Julian said 'not yet'. She wanted to have a bbq on the back deck of the bungalow first.

Candy Perfume Girl was going to come and help on Monday, and not a moment too soon.

I Flood, You Flood, We All Flood.

"Some people would love to have your problems", said Smithy.
Julian didn't say anything. She was embroiled in a hand of bridge and wasn't sure whether to try to set up the clubs or the diamonds, and finally decided on the diamond play. The queen held so she told him that she knew that some people would love her problems. She thought immediately of a dying friend, and a breast removal freind and people in India and Africa who queued up for hours for a bucket of water. Meanwhile, Stewart's opal and jewellery business had only gone underwater 2 metres int the recent flood and most of the tiny stuff had been put into cardboard boxes and buckets

. She and Stewart and Valdemar had waded through waist deep water collecting what they could and holding candles as the electricity had failed. During the clean up she had found a Victorian penny stuck to the bottom of one of the drawers and a tiny, tiny amethyst heart in a small bag, as well as two pictures of his ex that she had never seen before. His ex would have liked that, but she would never know. One of the pics was very lovely and the other one wasn't so lovely. Julian liked the not very lovely one because she was fighting her small and mean nature.

They had hosed and hosed and lifted and moved and swept and hosed and she was tired. Stuart was exhausted. They ate hamburgers for dinner and after dinner Stuart said, "Is that it for dinner?"
Fortunately there were left over semi-home made apple pies which he was happy to eat. It had actually been a big eating day. Waldemar had contributed bacon for breakfast, followed by bread things and bread sandwiches and bread hamburgers. Stuart metabolised fast so he had no problems. Julian felt rather, well, 'bready', really, which laid her low.

"You've been shirty for years", Hermione had mentioned over a lunch which Julian had managed not to eat, "This is different, Hermione," Julian explained, "this is heavier. Like Magda Szubanski." She had been talking briefly of why she was unhappy with Candy.
"Oh," said Hermione, pushing her mayonnaise, chicken and bacon bits to the side.
"Hey," said Mary, "you're leaving the best bits," and she pushed her fork through the food.
"Looked a bit rich," said Hermione, and, "oh, you've got another glass of wine, think I'll get one too."

Meanwhile, on the sunny Canary Islands, Juan had been happily living it up. His life was not a satisfying life so he had spent his borrowed rent money on cocaine. He had also had a happy morning cooking up the magic mushrooms and making a magic mushroom and champignon omelet. If he had had those little Chinese mushrooms that grew with long stems he would have thrown that into the foaming butter as well. When Brian and Tina knocked on his door to collect the rent which was well and truly overdue he decided to bludgeon them to death with a ball peen hammer. He blamed the drugs but the judge and jury saw right through him.

Julian took a break from reporting and sat a table with Whami and Bham for a quick hand or two. It was over quickly, unlike the bludgeoning of Brian and Tina, who had moved from Mumbles to Spain in their retirement years because they wanted a quiet life. Juan blamed the drugs and was quoted as saying "Even now I can't understand what drove me to do what I did - I was totally out of it," but the jury were not convinced. Santana told the jury at Las Palmas criminal court that "after killing the couple, he wrapped their bodies in blankets and white plastic bags, carried them to the boot of his car late at night and drove to scrubland where he hid them under a pile of rocks."




A Spanish man has been found guilty of murdering a Welsh couple who had moved to the Canary Islands for a new life.

Juan Carmelo Santana, 42, had admitted bludgeoning Brian and Tina Johnson when they called to collect overdue rent at his flat on Fuerteventura in July 2006.

The jury rejected his claim he was not in control of his actions because he had taken cocaine and magic mushrooms.

Santana will be sentenced next week. The couple's son Sam, 29, said he was relieved the case was over.

Santana told the jury at Las Palmas criminal court that after killing the couple, he wrapped their bodies in blankets and white plastic bags, carried them to the boot of his car late at night and drove to scrubland where he hid them under a pile of rocks.

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Juan Carmelo Santana killed Brian and Tina Johnson with a hammer

"Even now I can't understand what drove me to do what I did - I was totally out of it," he told the court.

But the jury returned a unanimous verdict, dismissing Santana's claims that he had acted under the influence of drugs and that he was depressed due to the death of his wife two years earlier.

The jury said: "The defendant acted with intent or could have at least foreseen the consequences of his actions.

"In killing Mr Johnson he deliberately and inhumanely increased the victim's suffering by inflicting unnecessary blows."

The bodies of Mr Johnson, 59, and his 57-year-old wife were discovered four days later by a huntsman out exercising his dogs

The trial had heard that Santana had moved the couple's car to a harbour, to give the impression they had taken a ferry to Lanzarote.

The Johnsons had moved to the Spanish island from Mumbles in Swansea, six-and-a-half years earlier and bought a bar with friends. They had run the Park Inn in Mumbles, Swansea, in the 1980s.

The prosecution in the case said they expected Santana to be given a 35-year prison term.

State prosecutor Tomás Fernández had argued that Santana "knew perfectly what he was doing" and had killed the Johnsons because he had spent the money his son had given him to pay off the rent owed to the couple.

The couple's son Sam said he was happy a conviction had been secured and would now try to move on with his life.

"I am pleased at the outcome but nothing can ever bring my parents back," he said.

"At least I now know this man will spend a long time behind bars for what he did.

"I am less happy at the wording of the verdict, particularly the distinction drawn between my mother and father in terms of their suffering.

"What level of suffering did Mum need in order to be equated with my father? My father died instantly but she was left there to die and might possibly be alive today if she had received medical attention."

Mr Johnson added that he would try to get his parents' bodies flown back to Wales. They had been buried temporarily in Fuerteventura in 2006 in case more forensic tests were needed.